I’m setting the bar high enough for them to set their own. That’s always been my mantra. Back in the workforce days, I carried it with me, and even now in this entrepreneurial, surprisingly creative…lane I’m in, it still applies.
See, people like to twist things. Back then it came in the form of “training the next guy” or “passing down the ropes.” Now it comes in the form of finesse. Manipulation disguised as admiration. Kindness being mistaken for weakness. It’s the same old game, just dressed differently. And because of that, my circle has gotten smaller and smaller. Matter of fact, I don’t even think it’s a circle anymore. Maybe just a line.
But here’s the thing…I’ve been blessed. I’ve found myself in places where not only was I welcomed, but where I thrived. And the beauty in that is, thriving inspires. People see you create, they see you build, they see you speak, and they get moved to do their own thing. Some even give you credit, some don’t, and some… well, some just copy. Some hang around a little too close, trying to learn the blueprint, trying to steal the playbook. Almost like a movie scene, you wouldn’t notice it at first glance unless you knew how to look deeper.
And because I know, I don’t share everything. I hold back. I guard. But let me be real… holding back also affects me. I stop myself from pouring out fully, and that’s not who I want to be. So lately I’ve been working on the opposite…preparing my exit from that guarded shell. Preparing to step back into the world fully, to take advantage of all the blessings already waiting for me.
The other day I heard a quote…?don’t ask me to repeat it word for word because I’ll butcher it, but it was something like: “You only become the villain because you were successful.” And man, that hit me. Because sometimes people really will paint you as the villain, not because of anything you did, but because of how well you did it.
That’s wild, right? And if you let it, it can eat at you. But me? I’ve seen too many people broken by things like that. I’ve watched how easy it is to bend, to snap, to give in. And it only made me stronger. I made a decision a long time ago: that’s not gonna be me.
Still, it’s crazy how manipulation wears different masks. Say no to someone, and suddenly you’re the enemy. Tell somebody they can’t have the cheeseburger but they can have the burger, and they lose their mind. Maliciousness. Even the word sounds exactly like what it is…ugly, sharp, deliberate. That alone could be its own blog post. But let’s keep it moving.
I’m not training my replacement. Not in life, not in business, not in anything. At this point in my journey…my career, my wisdom, my scars, my wins,,I’ve earned my voice. And I’ve learned something about it: I don’t owe long explanations anymore. Either you get it, or you don’t. Either you lean in, or you miss it.
Because here’s the truth, I used to over explain. I’d break something down to the root, to the soil, even water it for you, because I cared. And somehow, those same people would still be the most difficult to deal with. They didn’t want to understand. They just wanted to take.
So I’m done with that. No more watering down my energy for those who don’t want to listen. No more apologizing for standing on what I know. If I’ve been painted as the villain, then maybe I’ll play the role. Sarcastically, of course. Not because that’s who I really am, but because I’m done fighting the narrative.
From here on, I’ll be exactly who they think I am. Funny thing is, that’s still gonna make me stronger. Stronger for me, stronger for my purpose, stronger for what’s next.
Because at the end of the day…I’m not training my replacement.
—B
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