Depression doesn’t wear a uniform. It doesn’t send a memo. It doesn’t have a look that tells you, “Notice me, help me.” You can’t always spot it. You can’t always explain it. And that is exactly why it’s so dangerous to assume someone is okay just because they look like everything is together.
Stop looking for signs to care. Stop waiting for reasons to help, show sympathy, or check in on someone. If you see someone struggling, don’t ask yourself if it’s real or visible. Just show up. Trust me, I know firsthand.
Here’s your reminder: depression doesn’t have a face. It doesn’t announce itself. If you didn’t know that before, now you do. Take this as your sign to be more humane. One day it could be you, or someone you love.
I’ve been living with what I call “high functioning depression.” Maybe that term already exists, maybe it doesn’t. I speak my truth first and allow room for validation later.
High functioning depression can look beautiful. On the outside it looks like life is together, like I have it all figured out. But each day, each hour, each second is a battle to remind myself to stay busy, stay focused, follow routines, and maintain the discipline I’ve built to keep moving forward. This is in the midst of chaos…the chaos of the world, the chaos of my personal life, and all the things I cannot control.
Even in this struggle, I push myself to show up for others. I try to be the strength they need, to guide them if they are facing something similar. Helping others becomes a way to heal my own depression. It is not easy, but I believe my purpose on this earth is to be exactly who I am, no matter the challenges I face. I remind myself daily that I am here not just by force, but for a reason. I use my platform to be vulnerable, to be transparent, and to inspire others to stay for one more day.
This reflection came to me after seeing a TikTok video of a girl named Emma Atienza. She said, “If I pass away tomorrow, I want you all to know I love you all very, very much,” followed by a highlight reel of her life. A life she took on October 22, 2025. On the outside world, it looked like her life was perfect.
That’s what hit me. It was a mirror, a flashback to moments when I didn’t want to be here. It reminded me why it is so important to practice what I preach: to be present, to spend as much time as I can with those I love, and to balance that with time for myself. Time to reflect, release, reset, and continue.
My message to those who are strong, resilient, and high functioning is this: there is no magic cure for depression, but there is help. Help comes in the form of hope, discipline, and dedication. Find something you love, something that grounds you, and do it every single day. No matter how small or simple, do it for yourself.
If you are someone managing high functioning depression, find a safe space. Find someone you trust who will listen. Ask for help when you need it. Do not carry it all alone. And if the people around you do not receive your struggle, if they fail to notice or respond, remove them. Protect your mental health. Make your well being a priority every single day.
Find happiness on purpose. Surround yourself with people who are like minded and supportive.
Depression may be invisible, but your resilience, your care for yourself, and your effort to show up for the people around you is very visible.
Be the proof that even in silence, you can fight, heal, and inspire.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health challenges, emotional distress, substance use problems, or just need to talk, call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org 24/7
Hope this helps,
-B
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